Rambo (2008)

Should I see it?
No.

Short Review: It is like Shakespeare, if Shakespeare’s works were loaded down with gratuitous gore, sparse, monosyllabic dialog and didn’t have any complicated plotting…and if Shakespeare was a complete dolt, let’s toss that in for good measure.

What follows is a spoiler, assuming that this film can be spoiled in the first place.

Sweaty Italian lunk lumbers around in the jungles of Thailand. Sweaty Italian lunk gets hired by wispy Christian guys and their hot Christian chick. Wispy Christian guys and their hot Christian chick get kidnapped by vicious, yet somehow faceless, Burmese gangsters who look remarkably like all of the vicious, yet somehow faceless, Vietnamese soldiers the sweaty Italian lunk slaughtered thirty years ago. Vicious, yet somehow faceless, Burmese gangsters torture wispy Christian guys with pigs and rough language. Sweaty Italian lunk grudgingly chooses to slaughter the vicious yet somehow faceless Burmese gangsters to save the remaining wispy Christian guys and, of course, their hot Christian chick. In the end the wispy Christian guy is shown that Christian piety is crap and brute force, might makes right diplomacy wins the heart of the now confused hot Christian chick.

If this seems interesting to you, then you will probably enjoy this film. If the idea of Sylvester Stallone tugging this corpse of a character out of the crypt of cinematic memories makes you roll your eyes, you will probably not enjoy this film. To be as blunt as possible, this is what it is – violent, dumb and amoral.


Related Reviews:
First Blood (1982)
Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)
Rambo III (1988)


Other Critic’s Reviews:
Film School Rejects
Film Blather